Grooves

Hi all,
Every once in a while I'll come to a realization about my life that makes me a little reflective. Not some moment of clarity but a small tidbit that probably makes a big difference in the type of person I am.

I haven't had a steady day to day schedule in almost a decade. Between jobs and school there hasn't been a time where I feel like I'm in a groove. I guess to some people that would be a great thing in the sense that you avoid a dull repetition but I don't think I've avoided that either. Maybe it was just a tedious time but I've realized that I have no internal clock. I don't get tired at a specific time or wake up when I need to. It's one of those things that has let me be flexible with work in the past but now it's a complete hindrance.

This new job requires a certain schedule, and it's not one that I've ever been good with. I should be getting up around 6 and out the door by 6:45 - 7:00 and I should be getting home around 3:00 - 4:00 but that's usually not the case. I can do that fine if I'm meeting someone at work but since I'm working alone almost everyday I can't bring myself to get up most mornings. The sad thing is that I'm still getting up very early compared to where I was this time last year. The problem is that still isn't good enough. Hopefully this will get easier with time but man, it sucks now.

I didn't want this to be a "bitch blog" but at the same time I do like the idea of having a place to air out my headaches. But no fear! I have been watching a bunch of movies lately (all documentaries) and feel the need to write something up about them. I got one more to watch tomorrow and I let you all know what I think. Like you care or something

Laters